Complaining is not a strategy

If you find yourself complaining a lot, it’s time to stop. Complaining is a waste of your time and other people’s time. If you don’t like something, try to fix it.

If you don’t know how to fix it, that’s awesome. That’s your challenge! Study the stuff that bugs you to see if you’re complaining about things that really matter to you. Or is complaining just a bad habit?

A few things of note: If you’re complaining about a person and you’re doing it behind their back you’re not going to change anything.

  • If the person is someone who is important to you, then share your issues. When they do “X”, you feel “Y”. You’re not judging them. You’re not condemning their behavior. You’re being honest that you don’t want to waste time feeling negative about them and you hope you can make things better.
  • If the person isn’t important to you, then ignore the behavior and/or spend less time with them.
  • If you’re complaining about family, you can’t quit them, but you can change how often you interact. Or you can open up your heart and accept them and love them for being their unique self, and look for the lessons they’re teaching you. This is a bold move but being open and generous beats complaining every time.

If you’re complaining about work, what specifically is bugging you? Is it something you can change? If not, then the only change you can make is how you react. Or you can change jobs. It’s not easy, but if work is bad for you, then you’re probably not doing a great job and why spend time doing something that’s not your best work?

If you’re complaining about life in general, that life’s not fair somehow, then work to figure out your “Why”. Finding your “Why” helps you get focused, helps you prioritize your time, and gets your adrenaline going which your brain loves. Attempting crazy dreams is a wonderful diversion. AND you’ll have the best stories to share with people. Imagine the smile on your face as you announce “You’ll never believe what I’ve decided to work on…”

The more you chase your dreams, the less you’ll feel like complaining. Who cares about the unfair stuff? You are doing crazy fun stuff and that’s all you have time for.  You are not leading a life of quiet desperation. You are organized. You are someone who makes things happen. 🙂

Sending you heartfelt peace from Pisa.

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